This isn’t something I normally dive into outside of my private client interactions, but it’s such a game changer that I wanted to pull back the curtain and give you a glimpse into how this works.
The majority of people I work with are doing. They’re not sitting around waiting for something to happen.
In most cases, the things they’re doing aren’t producing the desired results.
They’ve read the books, taken online courses, listened to podcasts, but the strategies fail to meet their needs of the moment.
When the strategy isn’t working, our instinct tells us to push harder and do more. But what happens is we just consume more, do more, and more often than not, do more of the same thing that’s not working hoping that if we do enough, we’ll get a different result.
Unfortunately, that’s not what creates momentum.
Here’s what I have found to be true.
When the actions aren’t working, there is a belief or a feeling that is in the way.
In this case, we’re trying to do or compensate for an internal deficiency with external action.
It may be trying to overcome the feeling of guilt we get if we’re not working because we were raised to think that hard work and long hours equals success. That leads to the belief that as long as I’m doing, then I’ll be successful. But the real message under the surface was that you’re only worthy if you’re working. So we feel guilty when we’re not working because not working equals not being in the deeper sense. If doing is who I am, then who am I when I’m not doing.
What ends up happening is our actions are now driven by fear, guilt, and avoiding … the result is working too hard and not taking time to recover and most of the time missing out on more lucrative opportunities.
But what happens when we release that fear?
Here’s what I mean by release…
We decide that I’m not what I do.
We decide to live in the reality that says taking time to rest and recover is natural. It’s not only natural, it’s a must if I am going to play the long game. And as a result of releasing the feelings associated with being stuck, overworked, and stressed, we start to focus more on the feelings of freedom, the possibility of new ventures, and defining what success means to us.
Then we start to see the difference in action. It’s clear which actions feed old patterns of feeling and being and which ones feed new feelings and ways of being.
That is alignment.
That is consciously creating.
It’s using a different set of metrics and measurements to gauge progress, make decisions, and defining what success means for us.
If you’re caught in the cycle of doing the same thing with little or nothing to show for it and feeling depleted, then it’s clearly time to switch things up.
Getting clear and moving in the right direction is the number one thing that get my clients out of those old cycles.
They start being pulled in the direction of what they want and stop trying to fight reality.
But most importantly, they break the old cycles of thinking and feeling and create new ones that naturally feed more inspired action.
The funny thing about it is that most people think they need to be clear before they get some help. Or that everything in their life has to be neat and tidy so they can really focus on change. That couldn’t be farther from the truth.
Fortunately, the majority of people I talk with realize that creating clarity is a by-product of doing the work and they’re not going to figure it out on their own, or they would have by now.
But some of them don’t come to that realization. As someone who has been there and helped a lot of people get out of being stuck, it’s painful to watch people choose to stay there. Whether they’re doing it consciously or unconsciously doesn’t matter. It’s still painful.
And at the end of the day, we all get to choose how we learn our lessons in life. We can choose to learn them the simple way or the hard way.
If you’re ready to break the cycle or being stuck and unproductive, then let’s chat and get things moving again.
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