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026: Growing Up And Being Yourself In Your Relationship with Dr. Corey Allan

When you want to know something what do you do? Google it right!

I first discovered my guest while searching the internet for marriage and relationship content to personally address some challenges. After I read his ebook, The Marriage Manifesto, and tuned in to a few of his podcasts, I had to bring him on to get some questions answered. Corey Allan is a great guy and a wealth of information and experience when it come to helping marriages (and relationships) thrive.

Corey Allan (if you want to be formal it’s Dr. Corey Allan, but he’s usually pretty casual) Corey is a husband, father, author, speaker, as well as a Marriage and Family Therapist and a Licensed Professional Counselor with a Ph.D. in Family Therapy.

He has a private practice in McKinney, TX and is the founder of simplemarriage.net, an online resource aimed at helping marriages not just survive, but thrive as well as Sexy Marriage Radio – a weekly show aimed at heating up the marriage bed.

Love is a process, not just a feeling. It produces action. Added to this, life is a choice (so is marriage). Therefore Corey works to help people:

Grow deeper Spiritually
Keep it simple
Be passionate
Live in community with others (and)
Enjoy the ride

To sum up: Marriage is more about becoming a better human than it is about the two people being happy. So when you keep things simple, you are in a better position to experience more in marriage and in life.

We dive into topics like

  • The Marriage Manifesto
  • Engulfment and boundaries
  • How not having your own life in a marriage could be causing the problem
  • The requirement for space in a marriage
  • It’s not your partner’s job to fill the void of the things you gave up
  • The trap of “you complete me” portrayed by Hollywood
  • The shift to being the best version of ourselves
  • The seasons of family and relationship
  • Growing up in your relationship
  • Inviting your partner to be in relationship with you instead of requiring them to be in relationship with you
  • The role of the nice guy and the pleasure
  • The myth of happy wife, happy life
  • Anytime you see your wife as a problem to be solved, you are screwed
  • Admitting you’re at fault
  • How to “get yourself in check” and draw your partner to you
  • There are parts of us revealed in marriage that we didn’t even know we had
  • Replacing the wearing off of short term euphoria of the relationship with long term connection
  • Becoming solid but permeable

Click to Tweet Corey’s quote

“Let the world feel the weight of who you are and let them deal with it.”

– John Eldredge

“Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.”

– Howard Thurman

Connect with Corey on social media

Twitter | Facebook | Website

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