Imagine this… you walk into a room and you’re expected to interact with people in a way that feels completely unnatural. You constantly have to answer the question that instantly creates pressure in your body… So, what do you do?
I’m not sure where it happened, but somewhere along the way we started to treat our professional lives as something separate from our personal lives.
Having a solid network of people where you know how each player fits in, how to continually add deep meaningful connections, and how to nurture those connections is important for so many reasons.
In David Burkus’s new book, Friend of a Friend: Understanding the Hidden Networks That Can Transform Your Life and Your Career, he unpacks what the best networkers really do. Based upon entertaining case studies and scientific research, David debunks a lot of the myths about networking and illustrates key mindset shifts to see networking in a new way.
I definitely fell into the majority that see networking as something “dirty” and David’s book has really helped to clean that up. There’s a lot of ways David does this in the book through entertaining stories, and taking the science into practice. But there’s one thing that really stood out for me and grounded this the most.
David talked about our network as something we exist in, not necessarily as something we do. This instantly took networking out of the context of something I was doing to try to get something in return and put it into a context of how I fit into a greater network and how to move around in it more freely, utilize the contacts I have in new ways, and how to build new ones.
Something else I really loved about Friend of a Friend is how David gets prescriptive at the end of each chapter in the From Science to Practice section, and gives tactical ways to ground the science he illustrates through each story by taking action.
If you’ve ever felt that icky feeling when thinking about going to a networking event, or passing out your business card for the millionth time, then you’ll probably feel relieved when you hear that it doesn’t have to be that way.
Friend of a Friend hits the shelves on May 1st and is available for pre-order along with some great pre-order bonuses at https://davidburkus.com/preorder/.
In this episode you’ll learn
- Why David calls himself a recovering academic
- Why you need to understand the unifying principles of how networks work and not just master your elevator pitch
- How most people find networking dirty and what to do instead
- The biggest mindset shift to see your network as something you exist in, not something you do
- What are Weak and dormant ties, and why they can be more valuable than your close ties
- Why thinking of people in a work context through more of a friend context can be helpful
- How there can be a great divide between personal and business and how to bridge that gap
- How the shared activities principle can result in a foundation for a deeper connection with new people
- Some useful conversation starters, and one David learned from Lewis Howes
David’s bio
David Burkus is a best-selling author, a sought after speaker, and associate professor of leadership and innovation at Oral Roberts University. His forthcoming book, Friend of a Friend, offers readers a new perspective on how to grow their networks and build key connections—one based on the science of human behavior, not rote networking advice. He’s delivered keynotes to the leaders of Fortune 500 companies and the future leaders of the United States Naval Academy. His TED talk has been viewed over 1.8 million times and he is a regular contributor to Harvard Business Review.
Click to Tweet David’s quote
“In God we trust; all others bring data.“
– W. Edwards Deming
Connect with David on social media
Twitter | Facebook | LinkedIn | iTunes | Website
Resources
- Pick up Friend of a Friend at DavidBurkus.com
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